Your Demotivational Blogger At Your Service


Even I have to laugh at the title of this crazy and insane blog post of mine. To be honest with you, I don’t even know if there is such a thing as a demotivational blogger… who knows, I might be the first one in the whole wide world. Well, the truth of the matter is, that I call myself a demotivational blogger because, I like to say what I feel and I explain things the way that I see them, not as others want me to. In other words, I hate to sugarcoat shit. WHY? Because it doesn’t matter if you put sprinkles and a cherry on top of a pile of shit… it will still be shit! The thing is, that people have grown up hearing things in a nice way, when in reality… life sucks! and then some!

In this day and age, people really have to wake up and smell the coffee… most of the time life sucks and we just have to get the fuck up and move on. The thing is that I hate to baby grown ass people. Not everyone is going to be someone famous, important, rich or all of the above. The way that I look at it is, that if we keep telling big ass babies, that “the sky is the limit”, they won’t get off of their asses to get a real job. Why? Because of all of the nice bullshit that we tell them. Hey look! If you want to be an artist, singer, music producer or a rich and famous person without any talent… you have to do it on your own time! Meanwhile…. GET A REAL FUCKING JOB!

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

My No Movement Movement

Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! You read the tittle right! You see… I’m going to start a movement without any movement. Why? Because that is the flavor of the month. Are you sad? Start a movement! Are you happy? Start a movement! Do you suck as a human being? Start a movement! Are you a very involved slacktivist? Start a movement! Are you an armchair activist? What the fuck! Just start a fucking movement! OK, sooooo I know that by now, my loyal 1.5 readers are asking themselves. Where is this crazy ass guy with a blog going with this? Well, in my personal opinion, I think that today’s society is just full of big fat fucking babies! Everything stinks to them, nothing smells good.

Hey look, people have the right to start movements whenever the fuck they want to. It’s just that people really have to grow the fuck up, grow some hairy ass balls and learn how to deal with life as grown ups, like we used to do back in my days. Some people really believe, that if they start a dumb-ass hashtag in what I love to call an antisocial networking site, they will change the world from the comfort of their home or office. My point of view is, that grown ass people have to learn how to let go of shit and move on, if that doesn’t work, then get professional help and go on crazy meds. But the sad reality is, that so many parents have taught their kids… who are adults now, how to bitch and moan when they don’t like something. Please people, just learn how to change the fucking channel and move on. I know everyone wants change, but a dumb and stupid hashtag is not going do shit for a cause! Oh crap! I almost forgot! Spread the word… #NoMovementMovement

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Stop Being a Little Bitch And Stand Up For Yourself!

About twelve years ago, for the first time in my whole life, I got help for my OCD. But to be honest with you, this post is not about my OCD. This post is about one thing that I did learned from my first shrink. I remember that way back then, I would get so mad at someone, that I would blackout and say things, that I couldn’t remember when asked a few minutes later. You see, the whole thing was, that when someone made me feel bad, I would put my feelings in a bottle and put that bottle away. In other words, I wasn’t standing up for myself when I had to. At the time, I didn’t know how as an adult, that approach was emotionally affecting me, since I’ve been doing it my entire life.

I remember my shrink telling me, that when someone made me feel bad in any way shape or form, for me to let the person know right away… but in a nice way. The whole thing was, that if I didn’t stop the person right there and then, in the future, they would continue their behavior towards me. So then, I would react the way that I was reacting towards that person. Being a shy person my entire life, it was hard for me at first, because I felt that I would hurt the other person’s feelings. But then I thought. What about my feelings? Don’t they count? What about how that person made me feel? My point is, that you have to stop being a little bitch and stand up for yourself. Don’t get me wrong, I am not telling you to be an asshole about it, just to let people know how they made you feel at that exact moment. Just don’t let it go, because it will continue to happen over and over again.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Motivational Speakers Are Full Of Shit

Wikipedia says that “A motivational speaker or inspirational speaker is a speaker who makes speeches intended to motivate or inspire an audience. Such speakers may attempt to challenge or transform their audiences”. The way that I have always and personally looked at them is, that they are people who are full of shit and who get paid a whole bunch of money, for talking about shit without really knowing their audience. Why? Because a motivational speaker can talk all he or she wants about being strong and making it in life. But what if a person is just suffering from depression and actually needs help and not some dumb ass pep talk, from a rich dumb-ass that don’t know a thing or two about mental health?

Please! Please! Please! Please! Don’t get me wrong now! I’m not trying to be a Debbie Downer or a Negative Nelly here! I just like to be honest about life. The way that I look at motivational speakers is. Who the fuck knows how many unresolved issues and problems they might have in their personal lives, yet they want to motivate others? I mean think about it. Have you ever heard about their personal life struggles? Yes you have, but only the ones that they want you to know about, not the whole story. So why the fuck should I be motivated by a completely fucking liar? The way that I look at it is, that I deal with my shits as they come. I really don’t need a bullshit artist telling me what to do, feel or think. When it is all said and done, at the end of the day, I’m the one that has to deal with my conscience when I go to bed.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!